Day 13

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder.

I took a couple days off from blogging. Mainly because I was extremely busy with extremely important matters that called for my immense expertise. (Read: I didn't have anything to write. And I don't want to bore you. Well, not a lot.)

Anyway, I'm back to it, with new-found exuberance. I can honestly say that I've missed you, anonymous readers. And you, Mom. 

Things have been pretty steady so far. 132 on Friday and 132.5 on Saturday. Blah.

Which brings me to today. I've decided to start taking measurements on Sundays instead of Tuesdays, because it made more sense to measure before I binge on triscuits than after. So I hope you've mentally prepared yourself for more naked pictures.

At this point, I'm pretty ready to be done with the 130s. My body, apparently, has other plans. So despite my every efforts to lean just-so to make the scale read 129, I weighed in at 132 this morning. Sigh.

Then the calipers and tape measure came out.
Here's how the rest of the weigh-in went down:

Weight: 132lbs

Body Fat: 25.3% (Down from 26.4% last week and  27.4% to start.)

(Skinfold measurements: Subscapula: 14; Suprailliac: 12; Bicep: 6; Tricep: 14)

Total Fat Weight: 30.5lbs (Down from 35.5 last week and 36.9 to start.)

Lean Body Mass: 101.5lbs (Up from 99 last week and 97.6 to start.)

Circumference: 149.5 inches (Down from 150.5 last week and 152.5 to start.)

(Neck: 12.75; Upper arm: R11.5, L11.5; Waist: 28.5; Hips: 40; Upper thigh: R22.75, L22.5)

Upfront, the measurements don't show huge progress (down 1 inch and 1% body fat). But when I calculated my "fat weight" and realized I've now lost 6.4 lbs of fat (not water, not muscle, actual fat), I was pretty stoked. So while the scale may only show a 2.5lb loss, my body fat measurements give me a bit more credit. That and John keeps checking out my butt, so I take that as a good sign too...

Here are the pics.

Off to enjoy my pizza!

Day 10

A Good Day

If there's one problem with a good day, it's that there is less to write about. Which, if you ask me, is a pretty good "problem" to have.

I weighed in the morning at 132. I think this was in part due to the fact that my scale feared for its life. That's right, I'm not above threatening inanimate objects. Whatever gets the job done.

Later, John took me to an amazing vegan restaurant for lunch, which helped break up the monotony of the diet. Plus, we spent most of the time talking about ice cream, which got me really stoked for Sunday. Ice cream. Go figure.

And finally, I got my knee looked at by a new chiropractor. Hopefully we've gotten to the root of the problem, but only time will tell.

Oh, and I have to mention that I came home from yoga to a delicious, vegan, high protein meal that John had prepared. I know. Now I'm just gloating.

Day 9

Frustration.

Today was rough. Really rough. I cried. More out of frustration than sadness. But I suppose it really was a combination of the two.

I'm frustrated with my diet. It's really hard to maintain, especially when the scale is being so unfriendly. I'm sick of beans. I want a baguette. And, for the first time in my adult life, I'm craving ice cream. I don't even like ice cream. But I want it so badly I could actually cry. Again. So we'll move on.

I'm frustrated with my knee. I don't talk about my exercise habits a lot, but as many of you know, I exercise quite a bit. I run 3x a week, averaging between 20 and 30k a week. I play soccer 3x a week on top of that. I practice yoga about 4x a week to balance me out. And I throw in an indo board session every couple of days just for the hell of it. But lately, especially on my longer runs, I've been experiencing a lot of pain in my left knee. I have a chiropractor working on it, along with a masseuse. But each session feels more like a temporary fix than solution. Because sure enough, my knee flares up every long run. Which brings me to tonight. Pretty basic 6k, except that I've started speed training. I got one 800m sprint in and my knee was at me. I took it easy the next round and then amped up for the third and final sprint. Long story short, I had to walk home. It was awful. Then, after dinner with John, I actually had to be carried home. Miserable.

Finally, to top it off, I'm frustrated with my digestion. My leg has been cramping a lot after runs (probably related to the knee), so my masseuse recommended I take magnesium. It seems to help ease the cramping a bit, and it also works wonderfully as a sleep aid. However, the downside is that it reeks havoc on my stomach, which absolutely blows.

So to sum everything up. I'm frustrated. Very frustrated.

Weight: 133.5

"I brace myself, because I know it's going to hurt
But I like to think at least things can't get any worse"
Hurricane Drunk, Florence and the Machines

Day 8

An Unexpected Day.

Today should have gone one of two ways:

1. I lightly glide on to the scale, see the numbers 125 glow up at me, curtsy, and then watch a rainbow form over me as I dance off to the tune of "I feel pretty."

2. I trudge over the scale, get punched in the stomach by the 134.5 glaring back at me and quit my diet, blaming my failure on everyone and everything in my path. Dogs included.

However.

I do not weight 125, so scenario 1 could not have happened. And I am not quitting my diet, so scenario 2 is out.

Instead, my morning went like so.

I woke up, went to the bathroom, weighed myself, and went back to bed. It was going to be a bad day. 

The scale had read 134.5. It felt like a big "fuck you." It was as though all of the work I'd done for the past week had been nullified. I was 132. Big Deal. I was 120 (10 years ago). TODAY, I'm 134.5. The exact same as last week. Groan. Sigh. Grunt. Curse. 

But instead of quitting my diet and blaming the dogs, I got out the tape measure.

And wouldn't you know I lost an inch in my waist! Plus, I'm down 1% bodyfat (which is about a pound an a half of fat)! 

So while I was massively bummed about the weight (and praying that I'm just retaining water), I'm stoked to say that I'm making progress!

Here's the dirt:

Weight: 134.5lbs

Body Fat: 26.4% (Down from 27.4%)

(Skinfold measurements: Subscapula: 15; Suprailliac: 14; Bicep: 6; Tricep: 14.5)

Total Fat Weight: 35.5lbs (Down from 36.9, so, a slightly smaller kindergardener.)

Lean Body Mass: 99lbs (Up from 97.6, which I'd like to attribute to muscle growth, so I will.)

Circumference: 150.5 inches (If you're wondering where the other inch came from, it was my right thigh. Please don't ask me why.)

(Neck: 12.75; Upper arm: R11.5, L11; Waist: 29.25; Hips: 40; Upper thigh: R23, L23)

And last, but certainly not least...

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No real visible difference, yet, but it's COMING!!!

Day 7

Nothing to say.

I can't think of anything but taking my measurements tomorrow. And the photos.

Yikes.

Current weight: 132.5

Day 6

Cheater, Cheater.

Yep. I'm a cheater. Sitting right now having Triscuits and hummus. And loving every bite. Side note: it is impossible to count Triscuit consumption. Impossible. I'm either around 10 or 30. I can't be sure.

Let take a moment to follow Rebecca's advice and tell you a bit about the diet I'm on.

The Slow-Carb Diet, by Tim Ferriss, author of "The 4-Hour Body," makes a case for better fat loss through simplicity. Below is a summary of Tim's rules for success.

#1. Avoid "white" carbohydrates (or anything that can be white).

#2. Eat the same few meals over and over again (so you don't get frustrated and give up).

#3. Don't drink calories (one glass of red wine a night is allowed).

#4. Don't eat fruit (except tomatoes and avocados).

#5. Take one day off per week and go nuts (literally, ANYTHING is fair game).

The book goes into a bit more detail, but those are the basic components. No exercise is required, nor is counting calories. The only other "rule" is to try to achieve at least 20g of protein per meal (you can see why I started eating eggs again). While the diet doesn't require calorie counting, I counted mine one day, just out of curiosity. I had had 4 full meals, consisting of at least 20g of protein each (two had upwards of 30g each), and ended up consuming just 1300 calories. 

Now back to the cheating.

For those of you, like me, who thought a cheat day was simply for cheaters unable to sustain a rigorous diet for more than 6 days at a time, read on. The cheat day designed by Tim has a two-fold effect. First, it means you don't have to live the rest of your life (or however long you stay on the diet) without Triscuits (or whatever your indulgence foods are). Second, "dramatically spiking caloric intake in this way once per week increases fat loss by ensuring that your metabolic rate (thyroid function and conversion of T4 to T3) doesn't downshift from extended calorie restriction." (Tim Ferriss, The 4-Hour Body) Seems to me like whoever said "cheaters never prosper" didn't do his homework. Probably just copied the answers from someone else...

So while my beloved Triscuits are not allowed 6 days a week, today, my cheat day, I am FEASTING on them! Still to come: sweet potato fries and bruschetta! Yummmmmmmmm........

Oh, and current weight: 132!!!

Day 5

Setbacks.

T.M.I. ALERT: Read no further if you are offended by too much information.

I gained half a pound.

Based on my "regularity" (p.c. term for poop schedule), I knew the weight gain was coming. I went to bed last night blocked up and feeling bloated. No surprise, I woke up this morning with most of yesterday's meals still in me. And the scale lovingly reflected that. Right before I threw it out the window. Well, I thought about it, but I didn't want to have to go outside to get it. It's cold.

So there it was, in big bold digits, 133.0... It might as well have said FAIL. 

It sucks. I'm bummed. I quit. The end.


Only kidding. It does suck and I am bummed, but setbacks happen. That's life. Pick up and move on.

So, here I am, day 5, 133lbs, sticking with it, and praying for a poop.

Day 4

Getting Naked.

I cringe every time I walk by the "before" picture I have taped up on my fridge (it's a lovely, full-color 8x10). The photo itself isn't the worst of it; I can simply look in a mirror to see what I look like naked. I cringe more so at the fact that now all of you know what I look like naked. And I don't even know who "all of you" are. 

A couple people have said recently how "great" I look, and how I "don't even need to lose weight." Lovely sentiment. Appreciated. But overall, ignored. Just like most people, I have parts of my body I cannot stand. I hate the pooch in my tummy, the saddlebags around my hips and the lack of separation in between my things. To this, some might say, "love your body, embrace your figure, accept who you are." I'm sure there are people out there who will listen to that and go on to have glorious, fulfilling lives. I'm just not one of those people. 

I'm pretty much sick of feeling fat. Side note: If I get one comment about how I'm not fat, I'm going to punch a baby. I didn't say I am sick of being fat, I said I am sick of feeling fat. So sick of it, in fact, that I've decided to actually do something about it. I got naked in front of a bunch of strangers on the internet. 

The question is, WHY?

Obviously not to show off.

I stripped down and started writing so there would be no backing out. The truth is, I've tried to lose this weight for years. But I quit every time. I just haven't been able to hold myself accountable. That's where you guys come in. Every person who tracks my progress holds me accountable. If I quit, you know. 

Imagine if you told every person you know (i.e. your facebook account) that you were doing something. Imagine you reminded them every day that you were doing it and kept them updated on your progress. Then, imagine just giving up one day. Imagine letting down all the people you had inspired. Imagine accepting failure, simply for lack of trying, in front of everyone. I couldn't do it. Could you?

Have a goal? Get naked! Spread the word! You don't have to motivate yourself, let peer pressure do the motivating for you! It works, and once you swallow your pride, it's actually pretty fun.

Current weight: 132.5

Day 3

Ups and Downs

I ran hills last night. 10, to be exact. It took about an hour and a half. It was -9 degrees Celsius (for my American friends, that's a balmy 15F).

I wanted to die. I wanted to go home. I wanted to do just about anything other than run hills. And it wasn't one of those workouts where you get halfway through and think, "Okay, I'm halfway there, I can do this!" It was the type where you say, "What do you mean I'm only halfway?!?" I was cold, I was sniffly (still recovering from the flu) and my legs felt like lead. Extremely heavy lead. I would have actually preferred lead.

Unfortunately, this is not going to be an amazing, inspiring story of strength and triumph. I felt like shit, I hate running hills, and I barely survived.

This story is, instead, one of ups and downs. Sometimes, I have an awful "fill-in-the-blank." Sometimes the only light at the end of the dark road is the car about to hit me because I'm running in the middle of the street like an idiot.

But at some point, I get to the top of the last hill, and it's all downhill to get home, and life is great.

Just have to remember to keep an eye out for cars...

Current weight: 132.5 (a.k.a. barely visible to traffic)

Day 2

All Skinny and Shit.

I watch Biggest Loser. Religiously. I have for years now. And I don't even have a television. That's right, I go out of my way to watch it. I often pay $1.99 per episode. It's like crack to me. But I can't help it.

Stepping on the scale this morning, I felt, for the first time, the pressure my BL comrades must feel every week. Before you start going on about "water weight" and how I shouldn't use the scale as my indicator because it lies, just stop. I KNOW. I was a personal trainer. I get it. But I'm also female. And if you're a female and say you've never been crushed by a number on a scale, you're lying through your teeth. We all do it. I'm no exception. So indulge me.

So back to the nerves. I've put a horribly revealing picture of myself on the internet, and in all honesty, I'd really love to be able to look at it and go, "that was me, but now I look so much better!" But I can't, because that was yesterday. And I look the same. Just with different underwear. So stepping on the scale I just kept thinking, is what I'm doing working? Am I actually going to lose weight? Or am I just making an ass of myself in front of the cyber-world? I think even the scale knew how nervous I was.

Your current weight is...beep...beep...beep...beep...133. BOO YA! I don't care if it's water weight. I don't care if it's because I exhaled before I stepped on the scale. I care that I haven't weighed 133 since high school AND it mean's that since this time last year, I've officially lost 20lbs. TWENTY!!!

After reading my blog, one of my friends wrote to me, "Don't go getting all skinny and shit!"

But you know what? That's EXACTLY what I intend to do!

18% body fat, here I come!!!

Day 1

The Dirt

My thought of the day is, who wants to read a blog without all the juicy details? I wouldn't, so here's the dirt.

Weight: 134.5lbs

Body Fat: 27.4% (ahhhh.... you think this is embarrassing to admit, wait til you see the photos!)
(Skinfold measurements: Subscapula: 17; Suprailliac: 12.5; Bicep: 7; Tricep: 18)

Total Fat Weight: 36.9lbs (that's like carrying around a kindergardener)

Lean Body Mass: 97.6lbs (this consists of everything that's not fat, bones, organs, tissue, and even in some places, although in seemingly very limited quantity, muscle)

Circumference: 152.75 inches
(Neck: 12.75; Upper arm: R11.5, L11; Waist: 30.5; Hips: 40; Upper thigh: R24, L23)

And now, drumroll please, the part I'm dreading...
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I must be high.

Okay well it's all out there. No turning back now!!!